Luke 14 and living in the Way.

Luke 14:25-33

²⁵ A large crowd was following Jesus. He turned around and said to them, ²⁶ “If you want to be my disciple, you must hate everyone else by comparison—your father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters—yes, even your own life. Otherwise, you cannot be my disciple. ²⁷ And if you do not carry your own cross and follow me, you cannot be my disciple.
 ²⁸ “But don’t begin until you count the cost. For who would begin construction of a building without first calculating the cost to see if there is enough money to finish it? ²⁹ Otherwise, you might complete only the foundation before running out of money, and then everyone would laugh at you. ³⁰ They would say, ‘There’s the person who started that building and couldn’t afford to finish it!’
 ³¹ “Or what king would go to war against another king without first sitting down with his counselors to discuss whether his army of 10,000 could defeat the 20,000 soldiers marching against him? ³² And if he can’t, he will send a delegation to discuss terms of peace while the enemy is still far away. ³³ So you cannot become my disciple without giving up everything you own."

Don't begin until you count the cost. There is a cost to following Jesus. There's a cross to following Jesus. I didn't really pick up on that right away when I became a christian. I've seen a little bit what it's cost me over the years. TV, video games, and my emotional stability have all gone by the wayside in my following of Jesus. I don't really mourn those losses as I've seen the amazing things that have been a result of giving those things up, but I realized today that it's more than that. 

There's such a cost. To follow Jesus, to be his disciple, is a full time occupation. It costs not just my TV and video games, it costs everything. So much so that he warns us to count that cost before following him. To sit down and think about whether we're ready to commit to that. 

"You cannot become my  disciple without giving up everything you own." everything. If we commit to discipleship, it will change everything. Not just some things. Everything. How we talk, how we think. About people, life events, responsibility, family, community, the environment, food, war, life, death, exercise...everything.

I don't think I've given up everything. I think I've been a half-hearted disciple. I'm scared. I'm scared of counting the cost. I'm scared of what that cost might really be...I'm scared that cross reference isn't as figurative as I like to make it out to be.

If I am to be Jesus' disciple, his follower, then...

• I must hate everything in comparison. The people I love most in this world must be nothing compared to him and his way. My life must be nothing compared to him and his way.
• I must realize what the cost will be. And consider it carefully. He repeats that for emphasis. It's like he's saying "make doubly sure you know what you're getting into here." because...
•  I must give up everything. Everything. The things I hold dearest I must give up. He may give them back, may let me keep them. My friends, my music, my job, my comfort, my home, my desire for a spouse, my desires for anything...they must be his first, and mine second. 

It's scary as hell, but I'm convinced he's right, and that it's better...in my head at least. It needs to infuse how I live, still. Daily. Pray that it would.